Saturday, July 14, 2012

Why am i still single?

 So today, we are trying to find out why are a lot of ladies still single.  Yes, we are going in straight today.  Are we single because we dream of wanting the perfect guy, one who does not even exist, and we forget to face the realities of life?  On the other hand, is there something wrong with all the brothers out there?

I am still single, and I’ve been told severally that it’s probably because I set my standard too high, and that I need to lower it because it might be affecting me negatively.  However, is there really anything like setting your standard too high?  Should I settle for less because I want to get married quickly?  Is it wrong to want the best?  Believe the answer to that question is a resounding NO.  There’s nothing wrong in wanting the best, but you have to know where to draw the line between watching too many romance flicks and facing the realities of life.

Every woman/man wants someone who will complement them where they are lacking and under no circumstance should any woman compromise this just because she wants to get married; we all know where that will lead to: A DIVORCE.

Now, in searching for our supposed Mr. Right, there are basic things to watch out for: Is he hard working?  Honest?  Focused?  God-fearing?  Respectful?  Does he encourage your dreams?  Is he one who constantly puts you down?  Does he ask for your opinion on things?  Does he carry you along on things?  These are just some of the things one should look out for in a life partner.  Don't get me wrong o, there’s nothing wrong in wanting a handsome ,rich and sexy looking guy, but should those be his only qualities?  Is it enough to marry a person based on their physical attributes?

 A colleague of mine who got married a couple of months ago is currently bemoaning the fact that his wife practically has no idea of what to do with a home.  When I asked him why he married her, he said he was captivated by her beauty, so I told him to stop complaining and enjoy his beautiful wife.  And that's where most of us women get it wrong, we wait so long in the hope that some handsome and extremely rich prince will come and sweep us off our feet, that we wake up one morning and realize that we are 35 and still single, with no clue as to how or why we are still single, if you find yourself in this category, then you really need to re-assess and  re-prioritize your qualities in a man(Onyinye take note, though am not yet 35 sha).secondly, we really should stop looking for MR PERFECT.  He doesn't exist, Mr. perfect is the man i described in my last post, and i don't think any copies of such guys still exist in our world of today, they have all gone into extinction, rather, we should look for someone whose faults we can live with (after all, every man comes with a little fault, not from the manufacturer sha), but whatever you do, don’t settle for less.

Now don't get it twisted, am not saying one should not look for a handsome guy-God knows I pray for one daily-but there should be more beyond his looks.  Most times when you meet a man, you just go "I can’t marry him" or "I will love to marry him".  Why is that?  We are repelled/attracted by what we see, but it shouldn't end there, we should get to know him either ways and that should be the deciding factor, not his looks.  some of us have a checklist or quadrants (as one of my readers said)that we use to score men, but sometimes, we need to go outside our box, from experience sef, I've found out that most good looking guys are poorly behaved, so after a while with them you begin to wonder what you ever saw in them.

learn to look beyond the physical and you will find out that you begin to see people in a whole new light, give that guy a chance and there just might be a ring on your finger soon(Tavia, I see you, give that guy a chance) *winks*.  And as one of my readers said, we should constantly ask ourselves this “are you worthy to be called someone's miss perfect?" that should be food for thought for the ladies"(Yetunde i hear you)

Lastly, don't snub anyone because you feel they have nothing to offer, or there's no connection.  You have got to give it time, open your heart and let fate take its course; I believe that you should find someone you can grow into love, wealth and happiness with instead of finding instant love.
Kisses.

21 comments:

  1. A nice article & advice.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Very nicely written, Onyinye..I'm 26 and glad I've already told myself that there's no Mr or Miss Perfect..I've learnt how to give love a chance...and I've found peace...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My dear,it took me a while to realise that o,but hopefully its not too late for me.

      Delete
  3. *Mr. Perfect walks-by again* lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rogie sweetie,y r u doin dis to me nah,my mr perfect o! Stop walkin by jare.

      Delete
  4. wow...I'm glad I know a Lady who is actually looking at the 'BIG' picture.U won't be single for long.Cheers. Post by Chilaka

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tanx sweetie,if only goger will stop bassing by.

      Delete
  5. I love your blog Onyinye. I'd like you to improve the layout and section your dieas into paragraphs. Its easier to read when its nicely spaced. (Just my thoughts).

    I'm 26, single and hopeful. I wish I can win over Mr. close-to-perfect! Perfection doesn't exist, but where did all the good men go?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tanx for pointing that out dear,am kind of a novice when it comes to computer and designs,but I ll continue to experiment till I come up with something good. Anyways,I think all d good men r either taken or gay!

      Delete
  6. lol! onyinye mr perfect is here
    in person of roberts.. Biko stop *walking by* Nice piece onyinye..

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hello there, I discovered your web site by means of Google at the same time as searching for
    a related matter, your site got here up, it appears to be like
    great. I have bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.

    Hi there, simply turned into aware of your blog through Google, and found that it is really informative.
    I am gonna be careful for brussels. I'll appreciate if you happen to proceed this in future. Lots of folks shall be benefited from your writing. Cheers!
    My blog try article

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. @anon thank you so much. I ll definitely check out your blog. Welcome to my world!

      Delete
  8. Heya i аm for the first time herе.
    I found this board and I find It truly useful & it helpеd me
    out much. I hope to give something back and aid
    otheгs like уοu aіded mе.
    Look into my blog post - work from home typing

    ReplyDelete
  9. Нello ϳust wanted to giνe you a
    brief heads uρ and let you knoω
    a fеw of the imаgеs arеn't loading correctly. I'm not sure why but I
    thіnk its a linkіng issue. I've tried it in two different web browsers and both show the same outcome.

    Also visit my web-site; paleo food portions
    Check out my webpage - paleo diet review

    ReplyDelete
  10. My codeг is trying to convince me to move to .
    net frοm PΗP. I have always disliked the idea bеcauѕe of
    the costs. But hе's tryiong none the less. I've been using WordPгess on vаriоus websіteѕ fοr about a year and
    am concerned аbout switсhing to аnother plаtform.
    Ӏ have heard gοod things аbout blogengine.

    net. Iѕ thеre a ωay I can import all my wordpreѕs
    contеnt into it? Any hеlp wοuld be greatly appreciated!
    My blog ... win your girlfriend back words

    ReplyDelete
  11. Prеttу! This has bеen a rеallу wonderful
    article. Μаny thanks for proviԁing thеse ԁetails.
    Also visit my page - can you get back your ex

    ReplyDelete
  12. Aw, this was a really nice post. Finding the time
    and actual effort to produce a superb article… but what can I say… I hesitate a lot and never seem to get
    nearly anything done.

    Look into my site - weight loss diet
    My webpage :: free weight loss programs

    ReplyDelete

please drop a comment and let me know what you think.