One of the most important aspects of any relationship, and one a lot of people shy away from discussing is sex, and sexual compatibility.
A lot of religions believe in waiting for marriage before having sex, which isn’t a problem. The problem is forgetting to tell them to discus it extensively before marriage.
I was listening to a radio show a couple of days ago, and the topic was “sex in marriage”. A lot of womencalled in to lament and bemoan their sexual lives. Some said their husbands were sex maniacs, some had no idea what to do when they got into bed, some complained their husbands came too fast and left them feeling dry and frustrated, and others had no sense of foreplay and a host of other complaints.
Some men also called in to complain that that wives were either too frigid or had no sense of adventure beyond just lying in bed and staring at the ceiling, probably making up a shopping list.
One particular woman’s plight struck me. She called in crying and said she got married at 30 as a virgin, and she really looked forward to consummating and enjoying her marriage, but to her utmost shock and dismay, her husband had no interest in sex. Once or twice a month was more than enough for him, and to worsen it, their rhythms were totally different. He was so slow, that, save for his heavy breathing and weight on her, she could forget that she was having sex, After five minutes, all she came off with was a vast amount of spit on her. She said the last time they had sex; she was calculating soup money in her head. It was really funny, but I knew she wasn’t finding it funny at all.
A lot of couples have different sexual needs, and unless you take out time to discuss and explore them, always keeping an open mind to what your partner needs, one person will be left short changed.
I firmly believe that sex should not be engage in it, especially if your religion forbids it. But discussing it, is the only way to avoid stories that touch the heart discussed in marriage; it’s something that should be discussed during courtship. You don’t have to