Did I Marry a Boy or a Man?

I love my fiance,l love him to death,but sometimes i just want to kill him...and his mother. I once read an article that said the way a man treats his mother is how he will treat his woman; so I was really happy that Uche loved, respected and obeyed his mother... the only problem is that he obeys her a little too much for comfort; he obeys her so much that he lets her run every aspect of his life, from what he wears to what he eats, where he sleeps and with whom he sleeps, just name it,she controls it.
After he proposed to me, we decided to get and furnish our own apartment. she wanted us to get one around her but I insisted we got one as far away from her as possible. She gave him unending grief about that and still uses it to get him to do things for her. she says things like "I am sure the reason you moved so far away fron me is so that u wont help me do... or its because I am a burden to you..."and that always works.
After we got the house, he left all the interior decoratings to me, from paint colour to furnishing which I did to our taste. I decided to go spend three weeks in the north with my parents so we could plan the traditional wedding which is coming up soon and when I got back I got the shocker of my life..our apartment had been redecorated, I mean from the paint down to the rug. when I demanded an explanation he said his mum thought "the aura and funchue" of the house was wrong for him so she changed it. You can imagine how i felt.
Now uche isnt the only child, he's not the only son, he's not the first neither is he the last child, but he's the only one of his siblings who lets his "mummy" run his life. Its like I am competing with her over who gets uche. This is really frustrating and putting a strain on our relationship. I am seriously thinking of calling off the relationship or giving him an option of his mum or me.
Please what else can I do?